I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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