so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
