i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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