He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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