I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize