if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Oh god it's open bar.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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