so explain again why im purple
no
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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