used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
