Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
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