So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
third nipple confirmed
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
