Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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