So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
