Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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