just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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