I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize