That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
