thus making me awesome and them whores
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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