You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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