Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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