I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
cat food counts as protein by the way
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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