sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
