Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she peed on how many people?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
