Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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