There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
