Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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