She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
