We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
