I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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