Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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