I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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