i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
two words: eviction party
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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