It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize