She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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