so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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