Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
home. puking in laundry basket.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
