is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
