so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
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