hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
