i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Randomize