I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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