HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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