The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
