My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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