My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
