I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
