i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
