My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
