thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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