My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
