Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
