yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
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